October 23, 2012

The Covers of Time

Time for me has been a big issue lately. I think about how I want time to go by faster, but I fear that if it does I won't be prepared for what it brings. I feel like I'm stuck in time, and that the things I want to accomplish aren't coming any time soon. I have a lot of things that I wish I was doing. I surround myself with professional ideals that I can't attain at my young age. At the same time I feel like I'm just being impatient. Maybe it's just that I want so many things, that I have to work for. However, it's not money or power that I want. I just want an opportunity to start somewhere, start from nothing. I just want to start. 

This might be the disadvantage of knowing what I wanted at such a young age. I studied and researched my career choices so in depth. I found people to look up to, and followed everything they did. In almost 3 years I had plans to accomplish anything I wanted. The problem is that it seems like life isn't making me follow my plans, and you know sometimes life does that to you. I just had to start over and come up with a new game plan. Sometimes a set back allows you to acknowledge the realities in life, and helps you devise a plan that is more realistic. I think reality is sometimes the leading obstacles in dreams. 

I sometimes read fashion magazines and spend so much time reading the masthead. I look at the names and their job titles, and think about how much I would like to work, associate, and converse with them. I just read the articles and look at the content, hoping that maybe I'll be involved in the process (even if the only thing I did was run for the coffee that helped with those long days). I often sit there, a little sad, and wonder if indeed that will one day be me. It's a little pessimistic to feel sad about not being somewhere you can't be at the moment, but it's just that I desire to be apart of something. To put my ideas, or just a bit of my help, into creating something with others. The thing about reality is that it can be as good as fantasy, it's just much harder to obtain. 

In my moments of "depression", I like to surround myself with my favorite magazines. I started organizing my pile of magazines that had accumulated in a couple of months. I sorted them, and separated them according to the publication company. I then took them into the garage to put them away in my archives. I had magazines from August through October, and they were to soon be with years of magazines. As I uncovered my little archives I realized something. I saw magazines that I had received not too long ago, yet in publication terms they felt so old. I realized that time does pass, and quite quickly. I noticed that as fast as I receive magazines every month, the time and seasons change. I thought that maybe in a few years I would come back to look at my archives, and look at the magazines that still felt so recent but were of the years I dreamed of belonging somewhere. So I grew a bit of optimism, because with every magazine I get, time goes by. As I read and research, I'll soon get to the place I aspire and it will seem like time flew by. Time flies faster by the flip of a page.

September 29, 2012

Raf's Dior

Raf Simons commenced his reign over Dior, in terms of RTW, with a more different direction than past Dior collections. The Dior we knew in the past, under the mind of Galliano, was full of theatrics and exaggeration. It was abounded with glamour and luxury. I think when people thought of the return of Dior, they reminisced of the Galliano era. Galliano is an artist, and he had a mind like no other. He created beautiful collections that will remain in the hearts and minds of many who witnessed it; as well as in the history in fashion. However, that era has finished and a new one has begone. Raf stripped away the theatrics, and presented a sleek, fresh, and minimal collection, at least minimal for Dior. Raf demonstrated a different type of elegance, where less is more.

As much as I loved the collection, along with many others, there were others who criticized Raf and called his collection amateur and boring (these being regular on the Internet). They exclaimed to the heavens to ask for Galliano back. I was disappointed in people to expect for Raf to do what Galliano did for Dior. Galliano didn't only use the same style of designing for Dior, he also used it for his own label. I mean that's only expected seeing as that was his style. Galliano was all about the exaggeration, the drama, the bold looks; Simons is not that. Even though Simons doesn't like to be called a minimalist, it is safe to say that he is more of a minimalist than Galliano. Raf Simons has presented his idea of what the Dior woman is, and what she wears; different designer, different opinion. It is no surprise that Simons came up with something more minimal, after seeing his haute couture collection for Dior. I admit that I did criticize his Haute Couture collection, and stated that I was disappointed (for the exception of some pieces). However one night I understood. I was pondering in my thoughts when I realized what Raf Simons did. I think he remembered that Galliano didn't establish Dior, Christian Dior did. The work that made Dior famous during the New Look  wasn't the same work that Galliano presented down the runway. In 1962 Jackie Kennedy wore a Marc Bohan Dior dress, a long pink gown, I remember it quite well in my history textbook. That same pink gown reminds me of Simons collection. The solid color gown with a shining metallic material. Raf Simons is channeling Dior himself and other past Dior designers, because that is what Dior is. He is using them as inspiration and using his own vision to put together his mark for the house. 

The theatrics is a thing of the past, it is something that Alexander McQueen and John Galliano mastered when they both designed in the past. I notice how collections  become more minimal season after season. Fashion advances and I think the age of theatrics is over, at least for now. With more people wearing designer clothes and becoming more interested in them, clothes have become more wearable. The age of collections full of huge gowns is something we rarely see. I really feel like Simons understands that, and I feel like he creates such wearable clothes because he wants people to wear them. However his collection wasn't too entirely minimal. He created a collection for the modern yet futuristic woman. With metallic detailing in the shoes and dresses, he resonated a futuristic era. His last couple of pieces had long skirts with a floral print, and top was a shiny, metallic nylon that resembled fire, thunder, light, and water. The movement of the model created a different illusion in the skirt, and many other pieces had a included this shiny nylon to create the same effect. The shoes, with a perfectly shape heel, had a metal strap across the shoe which evoked a feeling of a galactic shoe. The bags were simple and soft, which in my opinion were the epitome of the elegance that Dior is. The jewelry was decadent, yet in parts was very futuristic, which is completely cohesive with the collection because the collection does resonate the future. I really do believe that this collection is true to the basics that Dior was founded on, but also reminds the world that a new creative mind is at work. This collection brings forth a new moment in history that will continue on the legacy that is Dior.

September 23, 2012


I know I have been a little bit absent from posting. I took a voluntary hiatus and I had time to think and really evaluate this blog. I really just sat on my couch eating grapes and contemplated my feelings towards this site that I call my blog. I really thought about when I first started it, and my initial ideas and hopes. After having this blog for a little over a year, my attitude has changed entirely. My lack of posting shows that I am just tired of taking pictures of myself and writing about my adventures (which are more like actually leaving the house than actual adventures). I guess sometimes I just want to demonstrate something entirely different. I just find it so boring to post what I wore, when I can just do it via Twitter or Instagram if I really cared that much. I guess I just don't want to be THAT (fashion) blogger. I mean, do I really even want to be a blogger? So I mean that really explains my absence, and also to be entirely honest I've been so lazy to post. Which just makes me want to take a new direction, a new path to motivate me to keep going with this blog.

So with that being said, I'm just going to share with everyone a little book review.
I first heard of the Rookie Yearbook One a little before I actually attended the Rookie Roadtrip Meetup back sometime when it was still summer. I had two initial thoughts when I first heard of it: am I going to skip buying this since it is just articles I can read online, or am I actually going to buy just because IT IS TAVI. You know I didn't really think about it again until after the Rookie Roadtrip when I just felt totally Rookiefied and I was so proud and cheerful...I mean angsty. I did end up buying it because I just wanted to really start building my collection of books that I can keep on my coffee table in my chic Upper East Side apartment. You know when I'm a socialite partying with Lindsay (soberly of course) and then having Olivia Palermo over the next day. This book does come in the coffee table size, and it would probably look good in a book shelf as well. So I didn't buy it right away, but I got it eventually...I mean I just received it like yesterday but that's actually not what we are going to talk about. The book is just articles, editorials, and other pieces from the Rookie website. They are totally revamped with an actual print layout filled with pretty little things. I'm not going to lie, I never actually read all of the articles on Rookie (oops), but I just have a really short attention span online. I can never really focus on one thing at a time (oh the woes of the technological era). I'm not going to say I've finished the whole book, because I really don't want to finish. It is really so captivating and it just feels more real when you read it in print. I mean the articles are mostly for the teenage girl trying to live the life...of a teenage girl and not what society, or the media portrays teenage girls to be. FYI, yeah I not a teenage girl but this book is beyond just that. I think we can all really relate to it at some point because it really is about youth and the ideas we have (or had) at that age.

The yearbook starts off with a couple of actual signatures and entries (like the ones you receive in your actual yearbooks that you pass around and people reminisce about the past year). I want to believe the entries are filled with satire because they are symbolizing what a real yearbook entry would say. They are all for a girl named Rookie, and all these people write something in Rookie's yearbook. You even have the Mulleavy sisters from Rodarte share a little something. I just sat there smiling reading all the yearbook entries, almost as if they were written to me. I want to believe that Rookie is a girl who just gives no shits and is a teenage witch to Tavi's definition. She really encompassed everything that the whole book talks about. 

 Tavi is one person I just couldn't be more proud of. You know after meeting her I feel like you realize so much more how much of a genius she is. It's always annoying, yet interesting, to see how she often isn't taken seriously (mostly by other female bloggers and some males and mostly always people who are older than her). There's always a different Tumblr post or tweet complaining: she's just a joke of a blogger, she just isn't fashionable, she's just famous because she's young. In my opinion Tavi isn't the definition of the fashion industry, she the definition of herself (and in my eyes the soul of the modern yet somewhat antique teenage girl). She really brings together more than just fashion to demonstrate what she can accomplish. To think that she has realized all this on her own is just amazing. You really see other bloggers sometimes selling out and changing their ways to make themselves more acceptable in the fashion spectrum. However Tavi really has just grown up with all of it together. You know I'm going to confess that Tavi wasn't always someone I admired. I started analyzing her and questioned everything. How could a girl that just takes pictures of her accomplish something this major? I just really didn't give her my full attention, but once I actually read her blog Tavi seemed so cool, everything she said seemed like it was planned but also natural. It took me a while to get over this funk (I saw her H&M rap and fell in love), and since then I realized this girl may not ever be someone who will be predictable, but she's going to be somebody really influential (more than she is now I would say). I think like me people have this grudge against her and her popularity. I mean it really just is inspiring to see how she brought her ideas and imagination to be something she has grown up with, and crafted to be what she envisions. Take it from someone who used to be blinded and realize people like Tavi really are the geniuses of our generation. It's not about the fashion or the Tumblr-esque persona of the Rookie reader; it's the idea to craft your vision to reality. I really think that's what makes Rookie Yearbook One so special, it brings together memories and dreams of different people to complete Tavi's ultimate idea (I make her sound like some world dictator). The Rookie Yearbook really does make you smile and admire the words of others, but also reminds you of your past and your stories. It makes you reflect on your past and just is full of nostalgia...almost like when you read your yearbook at the end of the school year, and you smile at all that you have been through. With that you also can't keep but feel happy you're on the next step to make new memories.

August 23, 2012

paint away

So I had originally made plans to go to the beach with my friends. I knew I was going to have a little shoot for a post, but my plans got washed away. My friend suggested we go into the city, and I didn't have a problem with that since I needed to go get my watercolor supplies. So that was the first thing we did, and I was so happy to find everything in the store for so much cheaper than online. I really don't understand how that works out, but it did. I really wanted to start watercoloring because I just felt like I needed another creative outlet. I use this blog mostly for creative reasons, but sometimes I don't want to post so much because I feel like it would be so obnoxious to talk about me wearing clothes ALL THE TIME. I really also don't like the idea of having so many of my outfits on the internet. I decided to do watercoloring because I felt like it would be easier for me. I've tried acrylics and oils before, and I just feel like it takes so much color combining to get a specific color. I was just really attracted to watercoloring, it may be because I see so many beautiful watercolor pieces that are so abstract. I love that because I'm not a realistic person when it comes to drawing or doodling. I often just do a lot of different things and I'm satisfied with it. My drawing skills are not comparable to Leonardo Da Vinci (fact: I almost typed Leonardo DiCaprio which is semi accurate if you consider 'his" drawings in Titanic), to be blunt I'm not too good. Yet I see so many watercolor pieces that include drawings that aren't perfect, but the doodle effect that they portray makes sense. I just feel like watercolor can be so simple, yet when you include the color you create so many different emotions.

I think emotions are another reason I chose watercolors. I sometimes go through really strong emotions, and I don't know how to let them out. I've always envied people who could write, draw, or sing because I feel like they can do somethings so passionate with their emotions to create beautiful works of art. I've tried a lot of things to express my emotions, and most things just don't seem right sometimes. I mean fashion is something I use to express myself, but there's only SO MUCH you can do with fashion. That's why I wanted to take up something else, because I think it's so important to have more than one hobby. Watercolor pieces to me are so beautiful. I really like the way the paint and water come together to almost dance across the pages, using the brush as a guide. It's not like most paints that stay a certain color, watercolors change over time. When you put them on the paper, they seem so much darker and restless, yet as they dry they seem to settle down and lighten up in color. I just thought it was also romantic, yet the way the paint sometimes spills across the lines of a drawing is almost tragic and beautiful at the same time. I just really feel like I can put so many emotions into watercoloring, so it makes sense that I use something that portrays so many emotions to me.
I tried to take pictures in front of the gates of Maiden Lane, which is so beautiful to me. The Gates of Maiden Lane set aside an alley full of wonderful treasures. Maiden Lane is home to Chanel, Marc Jacobs, Prada, and so much more. It's almost like the gates of a palace. I also loved the way you could see the beautiful pillar/statue of Union Square. Of course the San Francisco fog wan't helping me take pictures. The pictures came our really foggy, but I liked the way they they make everything seem a little sad and mysterious. It reminds me of the old pictures you see of people in the city, it's a lot of nostalgia I guess.
Zara shirt, H&M pants, thrifted red shoes, thrifted bag
When I first saw this shirt, I fell in love with it. We first met at the Zara store in SF. I loved the scarf attached to it, and it just looked really chic. I didn't end up buying it until I saw it on sale online. I love wearing it, especially in the city. I love how it blows in the wind, and I love covering my face and feeling like I'm in a Middle Eastern desert.
I saw this wonderful Amy Winehouse memorial on Haight. They have a lot of these dedicated to artists who have passed away. I always wanted to take a picture, but there are always people around, but I finally got my chance. There is a plant in the middle, which I like because to me it symbolizes a phoenix rising from the ashes.
Here is my first attempt at watercoloring, I really liked the way the paper I used to sample the colors turned out. It reminded me of lipstick smudges on a napkin. The colors look really good together. I was trying to find the perfect shade of red.
Here's my first piece. I have always been obsessed with teeth and lips. I already knew that I was going to paint this even before I bought my paints. I just really wanted to do it, and I liked the way it turned out. I love the combination of white, black, and red. I am going to post more of my pieces, just to show you guys what I am working on...and so we have something more to converse about.

August 12, 2012

scarab beetle

While at family parties, I usually take the time to separate myself from the rest and either just sit there and catch up on the internet's info. Scrolling through Twitter, Instagram, etc. all on my iPhone. This party wasn't any different. After 2 Venti Iced Coffees, I had just enough energy to get a little photoshoot going. I had been wanting to shoot this shirt for a while now. I got it a couple months back from my local Goodwill. It's a pretty trippy shirt. The shirt from faraway looks purple, but up close you can see it is a combination of a wine color and a teal print of waves. In the sun the shirt changes colors. As I move, the sun hits the shirt at different angles causing to look like different shades of colors. It reminds me the way a beetle sometimes has that variation of color whenever they are hit by the light.Unfortunately I couldn't catch the variation of color in pictures, but I mean I'll leave that up to your imagination.
The has a nice print on the inside too. It is the same print as the the outside, but just that the waves are in a cream color. The shirt really has oriental shine to it, being from Thailand and all, and the silk just gives it such a smooth texture.
Thrifted shirt, H&M pants, Thrifted shoes
I also always feel a little extraterrestrial in this shirt. It must be the shine it has to it. It gives me Zenon, Girl of the 21st Century vibes at times. It is just a combination of a lot of vibes, and I really like that. I think it makes people guess more when they just see me sitting there all by myself.

August 08, 2012

Vogue encounter

Well while the cover of Vogue's latest September issue is still being talked about, I thought I would share my opinion and a little Vogue related story. When I saw the cover I was so shocked. THE HAIR. THE RIBBON. THE DRESS. Those stood out to me the most. I personally didn't like the hair. I thought it was just weird and just plain confusing. For a minute, I hated the cover. After staring at it longer and letting it sink in, I saw it in a different perspective. To me it looked like a statue. It was sculpted to present the biggest issue of Vogue EVER. The ribbon that adorned the masthead seem to be celebrating Vogue, in a time where digital subscriptions were at a rise; while print sales of the issue were declining. Those 120 years of style had not gone in vain. This cover shocked most of us, because US Vogue is usually much more conservative. The fact that Anna Wintour let Grace Coddington go all out for the cover was impressive, much more than most people appreciated. I really feel like this cover celebrates the art and symbolism of fashion, and it also sends out a shocking cover to a newsstand covered with pretty little covers this month. This was clearly a sales tatic. Gaga and a shocking cover? Of course it will catch most eyes on the newsstands, which leads to more sales. So while some complain about the ribbon or the hair (which I know see as a sculpture of hair on a sculpture of beauty), Vogue will have one of the biggest sales for an issue. You guys all know you will still be buying it. And now for my story:

It was a normal morning. I had just eaten a light breakfast, and was preparing to wash the dishes. I used any excuse to procrastinate having to wet my hands and dry them out with dish soap. After having checked my instagram and twitter over and over, I contemplated the important events in life. Gaga was tweeting saying she was texting Anna Wintour to get her to release the cover of the September Issue, which has the popstar on the cover. I was thinking "girl who do you think you are??? Like yeah you're one of the biggest popstars out there, but you have no power to decide when the cover gets released". However, I was also thinking that Gaga did have a point to want the cover to be released and it wouldn't hurt to be released early. So I was doubting whether or not the cover would be released.

After much procrastination, I was about to wash the dishes when I saw my first emails of the morning rushing in. I had three. I mostly get promotional emails from brands or magazines. This was no exception. I had a Little Monster newsletter,which I usually delete before reading. I then had a letter from The BTW foundation, which I read really quick and then moved onto the next one.

I started out reading the email from Vogue, I thought it would be another "personalized" subscription offer, however when I read the content I was shocked. I VICTOR VERDUGO HAD WON THE VOGUE SEPTEMBER ISUE SWEEPSTAKES. I thought, "this must be spam!!! They could have hacked the system and got everyone's email". However, I noticed that it didn't ask for any more info or to proceed to the link given. It just said I won, and had to sit tight until I got it (not those exact words). I was still in doubt, I ran to the bathroom and called the number of Andee Olson. It took a few rings before a woman answered. She didn't say hello or said who she was. All she said was "Vogue" in a slight accent. I froze. I was in contact with someone at Vogue. Never did I think I would say that. I stuttered and said I had received an email saying I won the Sweepstakes, "is this true?". I was so mad that I couldn't think straight. The glamour of Vogue was getting to my head. I was so overwhelmed. My dad, who was in the process of cleaning the bathroom was knocking on the door "what are you doing in there!?? Don't sit on the toilet seat!!! It has bleach!!!!!!"I wanted to yell at my dad "DAD IM TALKING ON THE PHONE WITH SOMEONE FROM VOGUE, LEAVE ME ALONE!!!!!!!". The Vogue girl responded, "yes it is true you won the sweepstakes". How was she so sure?!? I replied "OMG THANK YOU". This all happened in a time lapse of 3 minutes.

I told my dad, "OMG I won the Vogue book!!!!!!!" He was totally confused, and I didn't care to explain. He then wasn't shocked since I said the book cost about $40; yet, that book to me cost a million!! I went on twitter to share my exciting news in my overwhelmed tone. After hours of enjoying my news, I went online to remember when I entered the sweepstakes; which was not too long ago. That's where I saw it. THE BEST PART ABOUT WINNING WAS THAT I WAS GOING TO RECEIVE A SIGNED BOOK BY ANNA, GRACE, HAMISH, TONNE, ANDRÉ, AND MORE. That all had the worth of about a billion LIVES in my eyes. My heart could not take all this excitement. Vogue: The Editor's Eye was a book I wanted to buy as soon as I heard of it. My dream is to be an editor, and Vogue is the pinnacle of that dream. It was all just so perfect. I saw it like inspiration to pursue my dream, with even more motivation than before. I felt so blessed. 

Let me tell you how I won, just so you can see how I didn't expect winning. When I heard about the Sweepstakes I initially thought you had to guess how many pages where in the book they offered as a prize. HA! That would be easy! All it would take is a quick visit to the Amazon listing of the book. I entered the number of pages of the book. I was sure to win! Vogue hadn't thought this through, it was all too easy. Then I read the rules. I didn't have to guess the number of pages in the book, but I had to guess the number of pages in the September issue of Vogue; which would be the biggest yet. GREAT, I ruined my chances to win. However I saw that I was still able to win. I just had to ask a friend to join the Sweepstakes using my personal link. I asked my friend to play, and told her what to guess. My friend has no interest in fashion, so if she would have won...I would get the prize (well I hoped I would). I didn't think about it anymore. So when I received the email I knew I won because I referred a friend to join. That one entry, out of the 10 I could have gotten if I referred more, had won me the best prize ever! 

You can see why I was so baffled about winning. I just appreciated more and felt like it was meant to be. I was meant to win a book signed my many people I admired. It was all to remind me to stay on track of my dreams. I know the road is going to be tough. I know it isn't as winning a book. I'm just going to work even harder now, because I know I can really accomplish a lot if I just forget the obstacles and focus on the result of my hard work.
Here is the only picture I could find of the cover, it's shitty but you get the idea.

August 03, 2012


t-shirt I dyed myself but got at school, Zara harem shorts, thrifted loafers
You know sometimes I just casually go online and just look at clothes, and if something REALLY pops out and has free shipping (I hate paying for shipping) I'll probably buy it. When I saw these shorts on the Zara website I just knew I had to have them because: 1) I always wanted harem bottoms 2) Zara has free shipping. So when they arrived I was thrilled; actually I was confused because they look so weird when you're not wearing them. They reminded me of a tote bag or a parachute. I just put them on and they looked great once on my body. My mom hates them, and my dad asked me "umm what are those" when I put them on this morning. He passed the test though, since he took me shopping to Trader Joe's while I paraded down the isles. I've shown you all my shirt before. When I actually thought about wearing the shorts for the first time, I had planned another shirt from Zara but I didn't want to Zara you guys all out (if that is even possible). I really like this shirt, because I feel like it makes a statement, being supportive of LGBT rights, but it also is nice just for lounging along in life.